I didn't quite catch that...
From John Derbyshire, via Kim:
“Wherever there is a jackboot stomping on a human face there will be a well-heeled Western liberal to explain that the face does, after all, enjoy free health care and 100 percent literacy.”
Of course, the den Beste reasoning holds: if you believe in liberty, you’re actually a conservative, since the new definition of liberal means believing in things that are decidedly illiberal.
The story of Budget DIY has been all over the local news over the last week. ’tis a sad tale, with the usual overtones of people being made redundant just before Christmas; of uncertainty for staff and customers. And, as is the way with companies that are held in administration, there is generally a lot of operating on depleted and reducing levels of stock and cash.
So, taking that into account, I was slightly surprised to see this:
All of the outlets opened for business on Thursday morning, except the outlet at Kennedy Way in west Belfast, which was the subject of an attempted armed robbery on Wednesday.
Now, given that there most you would expect to get from a business in such circumstances would be a tiny bit of petty cash and a lot of clipboards, why would you go and try to rob the place? And if the people behind it had been watching the news, they’d have known that slim pickings were the order of the day.
And who says that the news doesn’t show anything relevant to the yoof of today*? If only these guys had been watching, they’d have saved themselves a trip…
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* – assuming, of course, that the people beind it were part of the yoof. If they’re not, then I suggest you put that fact out of your mind and pretend that they were.
For a number of years, I have believed that the best English/Ulster-Scots translation was this:
Ye maun hae College lett’rs eft’r yer name adae wi business or sax yeir wirkin in an airt relate tae business
Which translates as
The candidate should have a University business-related qualification, or six years working experience in a related field.
But I find that I was wrong; the actual best translation has been pointed out at Nelly’s place. By the simple joining of the English phrase “those with learning disabilities” to the Ulster-Scots phrase “Wee Dafties”.
Brilliant. And yet so very wrong sounding.
You know, should a revolution come, I hope that special consideration be given to the marketing division of the UK government. As mentioned earlier, their big brotherish adverts are really annoying.
Especially that bloody DVLA one. You can’t escape the DVLA computer, apparently. And you probably can’t escape the mindless automatons who staff it, either. Because they’ve gone all zero-tolerance on the easiest things to go zero-tolerance on; all it requires is a shifting of the burden of proof and a quick query on the database.
Whereas going zero-tolerance on, for example, corruption or mindless street violence would require actual work, so there’re not on the adgenda.
Oh dear. PSNI, you try, you really do. But you’re still holding too much DNA.
Police in Northern Ireland hold DNA samples on 1,116 people who have not been convicted of, or charged with any offence, it has emerged.
Now, that’s not a massive number. It’s merely 2% of the database being held without valid reason; that’s much better than most large public databases.
But it’s still 2% too much. And, even if the UK as a whole managed that low rate, there would still be over 40,000 people on the database without needing to be.
Of course, that is much, much better than the UK DNA Database manages, with not thousands but hundreds of thousands (if not millions) of people having their DNA permanently stored without actually being found guilt of any crime.
But comming off well compared to the UK-wide DNA schemes is being damned by faint praise. PSNI, I’m disappointed.
Hell, at least it wasn’t the numa numa guy…
And the goddamn wookies had better watch out once I’m done with the conquering…
Right, I think I saw the email mentioned here. And (if it’s the one I’m thinking of) it’s pretty distasteful. A man, running from the police, gets decapitated on some railings, and it’s captioned “Don’t run from the police”.
Now, it’s fairly gruesome, and I could see how people could be getting a bit of a slap by forwarding it about the office. But what, exactly, is racist about it? Why, exactly, is it disrespectful to the black people that live in Hertfordshire?
Had it been a picture of a white guy, would that have been ‘disrespectful’? If it had been of a woman, would it have been sexist? Had it been of a gay guy, would it have been homophobic? No. Clearly the racial (or any other) identity of the person involved is of no relevance to the message being put forth.
It is clearly racist to laugh at someone because of their colour. But, equally, would it not be racist to not laugh at them just because of their colour? And how is that a better form of racism?
I was listening to FiveLive last night as this story broke.
Michael Grade has resigned as BBC chairman and is to join ITV, the corporation’s main terrestrial rival.
All well and good, yes? Fella gets a better offer for a more challenging job, it’s quite preditable that he’ll go for it. Apparently it wasn’t as clear cut for the good people on the radio; they seemed shell shocked by it.
Why?, they asked, Why would anyone leave the BBC to do this?
I’ll be honest, I’m a little annoyed by the bias of the BBC. I’m a little annoyed by the cosying up to the politicians. I’m a little annoyed by the response to any criticism. But I’m really annoyed by the tone of voice and attitude in that discussion, evidence of the assumption that there is nowhere better to work than for Auntie; that ITV (and any other competition) are nothing but upstarts with nothing to offer the viewer, or anyone who works for them.
And to have that assumption while pushing – hard – for a significant increase in the television tax is adding further insult to the whole thing.
I like quite a lot of what the Beeb does; Planet Earth, Coast, Top Gear*, HIGNFY, Chris Moyles, the entire BBC News site. But there’s nowhere near enough good stuff to justify the size of licence fee, or the smug and superior attitude.
Sort it out, please. Otherwise there’ll be precious few people mourning you when you finally do get shat on.
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* – Although that’s clearly as good as it is despite the BBC’s attitudes, not because of them.
First of all, let me say this: I am not, in principle against the idea of privatisation, including that of the Water Service over here. Nor am I against the principle of water charges.
What I am against is nearly everything about the way that the government are doing the privatisation of the Water Service. From the lack of consultation, to the complete shambles of the contract being awarded, to the downright stupid way they’re going to charge, to the way that no other taxation will be reduced to reflect the removal of the drain on public coffers… The list of things that have been done all fall under ‘bad’ or ‘very bad’.
And it gets worse, for they’re introducing wealth discrimination into the mix.
Low risk are those whose credit rating is good.
Everyone receives a bill at the same time, but those categorised as high risk will get a reminder after 14 days, but low risk householders will not get that letter for another two weeks.
On day 21, the final demand will arrive at the high risk house, but the low risk customer will not get that until day 49.
Meanwhile, on day 49, the high risk customer has been referred to a debt collection agency or recommended for legal action.
Call me cynical, but I think this makes political sense, if you’re a cold hearted bastard. Because it will sideline the deliberate non-payers (probably led by Bob McCartney) until the can’t-payers are being dealt with by bailiffs; those who would choose to fight it won’t be touched with until those who have to fight it have been crushed.
Or it could just be another in a long line of stupid mistakes, being made by people who are in a little bit of a rush and don’t care too much. But, lets be honest, I’m more likely to plump for the cynical option, aren’t I?
However, there is a silver lining. Free credit checks for everyone. Which is nice.
A conversation heard upon walking into the office this morning:
Office person: Here, Ed, have a look at this poster for us, would you?
Me: Alright. Why am I looking at this poster?
OP: Bottom right hand corner. Looks a bit familiar…
Me: Oh.
Yes, ladies and germs, it seems that my international TV debut was released in poster form. In the Tele. Which, apparently, has a circulation of nigh on 100,000 people.
Which was a shock.
So, are there any of you with yer gobs on 100,000 posters?
Now, while everybody is distracted by my blatently transparent facade of disinterest, I’m away to see if I can rescue a copy of last Friday’s Tele from somewhere.
More »
Not sure quite that you’re being a big enough bastard? 1984 not instructional enough for you? Ex-conspirators changing their minds?
What you need is simple, and available from Amazon from Thursday:
Joe Stalin’s Big Book of Bastardism
Duck News rawks. Thatisall.
The irony of this story makes my head go a little like this:
A new civil liberties controversy has flared up over the news that police chiefs are considering using high-powered microphones to “eavesdrop” – as critics will see it – on crowds at the London 2012 Olympics.
…
But the former home secretary David Blunkett called publicly on the government to block the scheme.He told BBC Radio Five Live’s Weekend News programme that the suggestion was “simply unacceptable”, and smacked of the “surveillance state”.
Yes, children, that’s the same David Blunkett who was behind the ID card; who was pushing ANPR; who didn’t think that the Assets Recovery was a bad idea; who, in short, wouldn’t recognise a civil liberty if it came up and smacked him on the head.
Frankly, he can’t complain about the “surveillance state” that he sees comming. Because it’s already here, and he’s one of the main bastards who put it in place.
But now he’s on the outside, and the system works against him, not for him. So he’s whining, because he’s liable to suffer from the same things as the rest of us plebs.
Poor fella.
Ah, the bliss of living within yelling distance of yer ma. Sunday shopping trips. How dull.
On the plus side, I also went to see the new Bond. Watchable; not the best of ‘em, not the worst. Yer man Craig played as I though he would: as his character from Layer Cake but with more gadgets. Not a lot more, but more.
And I liked the email inbox. Very in keeping with the UK public sector, methinks. Especially that second message.
Aside from that, nothing much happening. Not even anything fun going on at work. Which was dull.
Politicians province wide were today left shocked when a terrorist gained access to Parliament Buildings
You may be aware, but I’m partial to a little conspiracy theorising. It generally one of the better story telling opportunities that people get these days, and that is to be encouraged.
The latest theories are to be found around the (aforementioned) incident at Stormont. And, between the afternoon in t’office and an evening at work, several theories were put forth. Ranging from simple madness, through political gamesmanship to MI5 naughtiness, they’re all very interesting. And probably libelous, so I’ll steer clear.
I’ll say this: the security was a bit of a shambles, wasn’t it? Aside from the one auld fella who jammed Stone into the doors, they all seemed to be a bit like headless chickens; many more were worried about getting the cameras back than, for example, disarming the nut. And the woman got the gun off him, then moved back into grabbing range. Not, I would suggest, the most sensible of options, but then nobody was turning up to help, they were turning up to shepherd the cameramen.
Still, Norn Iron was in danger of getting boring for a bit, there. Somehow I think that’s changed. For a day or two, anyway.
But yer man Stone seems to be a little … bonkers.
Not that this is a qualified medical opinion, or anything, but he’s the most recognisable of the Loyalist paramilitaries; how, exactly, did he expect to not be noticed going into Stormont?
It is a fact universally acknowledged that I quite like the BBC Coast programme. And last night’s show was particularly good, afore they covered the Irish coast, from Dublin to Derry.
Hey! I live there! What are the odds, eh?
In fact, they covered quite a few things I know about. Like St John’s Point, where my family came from. And Belfast, where I live. And loads of other places where family and/or friends live. Hell, there was even a quick glance of a certain, unnamed, dump on the hump of the Antrim Glens. Looks o’er the sea of Moyle. You know the one…
Very good stuff, anyway. And now, back to work…
But first, a digression:
I’ve had to present my passport on many occasions; either as proof of age or to get onto a plane.
In fact, in the last ten years, there’s only been one occasion when I had to produce a passport to an agent of the state without having a plane nearby. And that was a couple of weeks ago, on the bus to Dublin. Because the INIS seem to check most buses going south for illegal immigrants, They’re quite strict on the whole thing, and have been known to march a dozen people off buses because they didn’t have ihre papieren.
Which seems harsh, but it’s a border, and one of the things I have no problem with is countries enforcing a bit of border control.
But it looks like it not staying at the border.
Irish law enforcement agencies closed an €18m deal on Wednesday to procure digital fingerprinting technology from the private sector.
The Director General of the Irish Naturalisation and Immigration Service (INIS) and the Commissioner of An Garda Siochana signed a contract with an international consortium to design and implement a new integrated electronic fingerprint system (AFIS) for police and immigration service use.
Here’s where the worry comes in, though:
A spokesman for the Department of Justice told ENN the mobile fingerprinting unit to be used in Ireland would be primarily for immigration control. Digital fingerprints will be stored on a central database which will link into the Garda pulse system.
Oh dear. Oh dear oh dear. Prepare for the mission creep, methinks.
(Except, of course, for some strange reason that I would trust Gards more than, fer example, UK cops. Nobody pretends that the Gards are angels who’d never abuse power, for a start. They’re trusted less, meaning that I trust them more. Backwards or what?)
Seems I jumped the gun a little, expecting the EU to do anything as silly as allpy common sense to laws.
Instead, they cemented high taxation and blocked any attempt by commercial entities to try and benefit consumers by letting them shop around.
Yes, that’s who’ll be screwed by this: the consumer. The ones that the EEC Common Market was supposed to help. So it’s failing at it’s main purpose, more economic cooperation between the various EU states.
An it means that Gordon “the money grabbing bastard” Brown will be able to continue milking anyone who fancies a drink or a smoke. Because he’s a money grabbing bastard. Just in case you hadn’t noticed…
‘course, the EU isn’t any good at anything else, so we should ahrdly be surprised, should we?
I’ve mentioned my mild dislike of commercial radio; specificially the ads on said medium.
This is a common rant, of course. I remember, for example, His Clarksonness having a right old go at them in one of his books, years ago. And I don’t like it when otherwise sensible schools get involved. But the worst, the absolute worst, side of the damn ads was mentioned by TwentyM:
Female VO 1: And where is O’Reilly’s Nice Dress shop?
FemaleVO 2: It’s on Main Street right beside the post office. O’Reilly’s Nice Dress shop really do have some nice dresses!
Female VO 1: I guess that’s why it’s called O’Reilly’s Nice Dress shop then!
Female VO 2: *girly laugh*
Male VO: If you want nice dresses make sure you go to O’Reilly’s Nice Dress shop, Main Street, beside the post office. Sale on now!
The *girly laugh*, it really annoys me. Because, in 25 years I’ve never, as in not ever heard a real person come out with such a laugh without taking the piss. It exists in two forms: Sara fucking Cox, and the radio ad.
Leaving aside the obvious badness that is Sara fucking Cox, lets look at the radio ads. Examples of when the *girly laugh* would be deployed in ad land:
- Man does something stupid, woman rectifys it, rolls eyes and *girly laugh*
- Hen night, group of wimmen go bonkers with an inflatible fireman, fall over, *girly laugh*
- Girl wakes up, sees dog, *girly laugh*
- Girl finds out she has a week to live, finds a decent book to pass the time, *girly laugh*
But the worst of the worst is not even a full girly laugh. It’s a quasi-laugh, a raising of the tone at the end of the sentence, but in true ‘ad land girly fashion’. The offender? None other than the Shelia’s Wheels radio ad, where it ends with said girly voice saying “Terms and conditions apply” followed by almost *girly laugh*. Which would, in an ideal world, be followed by the sound of the 2×4 of Justice being liberally dispensed to all involved in the ad.
But maybe that’s just taking things too far…
This scheme has got everything going for it: large scale public sector IT implementation; overtones of big brother/Gattaca; massive potential for mission creep.
Can’t help but be a massive plus in my book, right?
Except, of course, for the obvious:
- The phrase with their permission is mentioned in the article, and will probably be the rule for the pilot scheme. For the full scheme? Maybe not. And what of people who cannot give legal consent, will they be asked for fingerprints without an appropriate adult?
- Fingerprints won’t be kept, is that how it is? Somehow, I doubt that that little hurdle will stay in place for very long. What with the well documented obsession of UK.gov with gathering fingerprints and DNA from people wot aren’t criminals…
- I’m no expert, so I’ll leave this dangling out there with no commentary: it’s going to be sent (encrypted, granted) over the phone network. Alarm bells are ringing…
Apart from all that, clearly it’s a bad idea anyway. Did nobody watch Gattaca, fer crying out loud?
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