The Onion horoscope has, as always, hit the nail on the head.

Taurus: (April. 20—May 20)
Never doubt that a small, dedicated group of individuals can change the world with a few vials of smallpox virus and a kilogram of plutonium.

Unfortunately, I ran out of smallpox recently, so will have to settle for the anthrax I picked up from the biology lab at Warwick…