Yeah, but it’s still a toy

Here’s a little something guaranteed to raise my blood pressure of a morning…

Two 15-year-old girls who were caught on CCTV holding imitation guns have been cautioned by police.

Officers were handed footage of the incident which happened at about 2000 BST on 13 August, by a shop owner in Manchester’s Dale Street.

The girls, both from Salford, Greater Manchester, were arrested on suspicion of possession of a handgun on Saturday.

Det Insp Mark Roters said: “Their actions were foolhardy and they acted without any thought for the public.”

He said police were satisfied that the weapons seen on CCTV were toy guns, not capable of firing any form of ammunition.

“I think it is important to take this opportunity to point out that even if it is a toy gun, where it used in this way, it does constitute a criminal offence and we will continue to take matters of this nature very seriously,” he added.

Three words come to mind: FUCK, YOU and PLOD. So the police were satisfied that the ‘guns’ were toys, and that there was no real offence, so they still fucking officially cautioned two kids for holding fucking toys in a public place.

Jaysus wept, I’m starting to think it was a miracle that I didn’t spend my formative in a cell, what with all those unforgivable times I spent with scary water pistols, BB guns and clothes peg guns.

Clearly, we as a nation have become fuckwits. There is no other explanation I can think of for the sheer hysteria that the mention of a gun brings to any case.

I despair.

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