Do you ever feel the need to get away from it all? To take a few days and go somewhere where a mobile doesn’t work; where there’s no local scrotes making noise; where there’s no bin lorry driving past at stupid o’clock?

Well, why not build a house in a cliff and let nobody know about it.

… they spotted a rope ladder which led into a cave house built into the rocks.

The dwelling, about half way up the 120ft cliffs, contained a floor, painted walls, seating, tea tree lights and several beer cans.

Sorry, did I say house? If there’s beer in it, it’s clearly a home

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