This day last week, I lamented the poor timing of Gordon. He’s just not lucky, and he doesn’t have the gift of arranging things to make it appear that he just cruises into the area to sort out the last minute things before claiming credit and buggering off home.

Seems that he hasn’t picked that up in the last seven days, either. So much so that he’s still hiding in London and trying to fix Norn Iron by phone. Probably the best way; we all know what the personal touch by Gordon does: causes things to fall apart and generally set everything back by a year or two.

The talks at Hillsborough Castle on the devolution of justice and policing power continued late into Tuesday.

Sinn Fein and the DUP have been arguing over the timing of the transfer of justice powers to Belfast.

I’m confused: that is one issue. How the fuck can it be taking this long to talk about? Are they sitting in stony silence for hours at a time, playing snake on an old Nokia? Or are they hard at it, whiling down the difference? I can’t see how – in the time they’ve been talking, they could have seriously considered every single calendar day between now and 2020.

Or, maybe, they like to feel important and pretend that they’re talking about serious matters of state. When really they’re just big kids in the playground arguing over who gets to kick off the game of football.