One thing about driving in London that came as a surprise: the moped drivers with small noticeboards attached to their windscreens. Generally, they sport L plates and drive with a big pile of directions on said noticeboard. How the manage to do this without killing a whole lot of people, I don’t know, but some of them must survive for a while at least.

Yesterday, I saw one better. And I was too flabbergasted to even take a picture, to my eternal shame.

This guy had the L plates. He had the noticeboard attached. But he also had a PDA in one hand, a stylus in the other and was paying close attention to both – the way his head was pointing he could only have seen down and not what was in front of him at all. He was doing around 15, heading towards a junction and seemed to be judging his speed and direction by the use of his left foot; he straightened it to turn right, bent it slightly to turn left, and still managed to avoid hitting anything.

Clearly, a talented driver. Just as clearly, an absolute loon and menace of the highest order.